Contingency Plans
by Ricta
Summary: Bats are ready for anything and everything, no matter how random. Crack


**Disclaimer**: I don't own Young Justice

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Contingency plans

The team was gathered in the training room waiting for Black Canary to arrive. Red Tornado stood off to the side, though did not explain why he was hanging around. Usually he spent his time in his 'room.'

The teens decided to start warming up while they waited. Artemis took to shooting arrows at the targets set up on one side of the room, Robin stretched, Conner started at the punching bag, M'gann worked some on shape shifting, Wally ran laps around the room, and Kaldur manipulated the water that he carried into complicated shapes.

Batman suddenly swept into the room.

"Robin, contingency plan 19" he stated.

"Is that the taser or the water balloon?" Robin asked seriously - all of a sudden holding both items in his hands.

"Taser – water balloon is contingency plan 29" Batman replied. Robin nodded tossing the water balloon over his shoulder dismissively. It burst as it made contact on the ground behind him.

"Where'd he get the water balloon?" Wally asked in confusion, watching the events folding out in front of him. The rest of the team shrugged, they were just as lost as he was right now.

"Wait" Robin said suddenly, "does contingency plan 19 include the bat shark repellent?" he asked holding up a can with the image of a shark in a red circle with a line going through it.

"No, that's contingency plan 56" Batman replied. The shark repellent joined the busted water balloon on the ground behind Robin.

"Bat shark repellent?" Artemis asked in a whisper.

"Bats are ready for anything" Wally replied in a monotone.

"But how does it even work – I mean using a spray under water?" the archer asked skeptically. Wally shrugged.

"Personally I try not to second guess Batman" he replied.

When the rest of the team looked up from their conversation their eyes widened in shock.

"No, that's contingency plan 74" Robin muttered throwing a shovel over his shoulder with a clang. It joined the French dictionary, mummified monkey foot, and desk lamp that had been discarded without their notice. Wally looked confused for a moment.

"Hey, where's the shark repellent?" he asked noticing that it was missing from the ever growing pile. Kaldur looked away nervously, but no one noticed.

"Where does he keep it all?" M'gann asked as Robin continued to pull random items from seemingly thin air.

"48...90…17? No 18, 66…13…what is this?" Robin asked holding up some sort of blue and purple blob. He shrugged and tossed it behind him along with the party streamers, frying pan, teddy bear, wall clock, and couch cushion that had recently joined the pile of items.

The team watched in morbid fascination as the pile of seemingly random items grew.

"Robin" Batman said. Robin looked up from where he was pulling out a … step ladder?

"Yeah?" he asked, eyebrows raised expectantly.

"Contingency plan 19" the Dark Knight stated.

"Yeah, yeah – I know, but it involved something other than a taser" Robin replied throwing a flower pot over his shoulder.

Batman simply raised an eyebrow in response. Robin sighed and went back to defying all logic by pulling a DVD player out of nowhere, staring at it for a moment, and then tossing it dismissively over his shoulder.

"Is that an anvil?" Conner asked watching Robin discard the heavy item while muttering about contingency plan 142.

"Seriously, is this some weird dream or something?" Wally asked furrowing his eyebrows. The others shrugged.

Robin suddenly pulled out a glowing green rock. He blinked at it tilting his head to the side slightly.

"Whoops, not that" he murmured putting it back in his utility belt.

"Was that…?" Artemis asked hesitantly.

"I believe it was" Kaldur replied.

"What was it?" M'gann asked looking away from the bird to her other team mates.

"A chunk of kryptonite" Wally answered. Conner shuttered.

"Why would he even _have_ that?" Artemis asked. Wally shrugged.

"Ready for anything, remember – I think that Superman was brainwashed or something one time and Batman had to use it to bring him under control" the speedster replied. They looked back to Robin when they heard him sigh.

"Can you at least give me a hint?" Robin asked as he threw a blender onto the pile. Batman smirked.

"Theme music" he said. Robin snapped his fingers in realization.

"Duh!" he exclaimed pulling out a small red radio. He pressed a button on the side of the device and music began to play. The Dynamic Duo swept out of the room passing Black Canary at the door.

She raised an eyebrow glancing at the pile of items Robin left behind.

"Contingency plan 20?" she asked.

"19" Red Tornado replied in his monotone voice.

"Ah, is that the taser or the water balloon?" Black Canary asked.

"Taser" Wally replied in a daze.

"What just happened?" Artemis asked.

"No idea" M'gann replied.

"I think we all learned something today" Wally stated. The rest of the team turned to look at him.

"The Bats are crazy" the speedster said.

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**Hmmm, my computer says that taser isn't a word…stupid.**

**Yeah, so this came about because my sister and I were talking about something and it led to Batman and Contingency plans. I have no idea how that happened.**

**This is totally crack, and I wrote it for fun :D**

**BYE!**


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